Wait for the flop

By Will Smith

"Those are your hole cards, as big blind you bet two then wait for the flop." I expected poker to be shrouded in jargon as thick as cigar smoke at the end of an all-night game, but some of my other preconceptions prove misplaced. The explosion of online games and televised tournaments means old clichés are folding like a fish with a dead hand (an inexperienced player with the wrong number of cards). My teacher is neither a gnarled pro in an eyeshade, nor a thickset heavy with a gun in his sock, but the executive director of the International Federation of Poker, to whom I am about to say something colossally stupid.

"You’ve got two aces, best starting hand…" continues Oliver Chubb, who looks too young to have spent five years as a professional player. "Wouldn’t it be better if the aces were of the same suit?" I interrupt, keen to show off my research. Oliver frowns. "How would that be possible?" he asks. Silence. "Ah, yes, there’s only one ace per suit," I mutter. As a poker faux pas, it could only be worse if I had spilt rum-and-cola all over the green baize.